Friday, March 26, 2010
Leaving on a jet plane
Today I leave for Maryland. Usually I would be excited and happy about this, but sadly I am not. There is a sense of anxiousness and foreboding I am feeling, which is not good. I am going to support a friend, and say goodbye to another, yet I am full of uncertainties. Who will attend the funeral will it be another small town everyone come out because she was young, and it was tragic? Or will it just be those who became her friend after the high school drama. Somehow I hope it is the latter.It is never fun to attend a funeral, unfortunately I have attended more funerals, then weddings in my 30 years on this earth. Too many to count. This one is going to be especially hard for me. I am sick of attending friend's funerals. Anyway, that is where I will be this weekend. So if you think of me, please lift me up in your thoughts and prayers.
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Sorry to hear about your trip and the tragedy that makes it come about. To help with the grieving process is good for those we love. The rest will fall into place and we all have people turn out for things when we really have no idea why. Maybe it is because they feel guilty? I am not sure but you will come out a better person. I will say a prayer for you and keep u in my thoughts while your gone. Take care and don't fret things will turn around. ane soon more weddings will be in the future.
ReplyDeleteArlene
I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your friend. I will keep you and your friends family in my thoughts and prayers. I hope you have a safe a trip. Just remember things happen in life we have no control over and all we can do is show our respects and be the person our loved ones have always known us to be. As far as those showing up who have never been there before, in my eyes that is just the guilt weighing in on them. The regrets of not giving that person the chance and really getting to know them. The missing out on all the good and bad times. Now is their last chance to try to show some respect for themselves as well as the person who was lost. I hope this all makes sense to you and that it didn't seem like I was being harsh.
ReplyDeleteYou will always have friends, least of which around this school, to keep the sacred positive flowing to you. I have buried my share of friends and relatives and rather than ask why, I ask why not? My sadness is just a selfish attempt to keep things as they have always been. I do not think that is the way any God intends things to be, change is the way of the universe; not even the stars last forever. Keep the good memories alive and live on to honor them! I am a Christian but I have much experience with many religions, especially the more "Native," Native American and Native European. They embrace greater hope and a greater view of the sacred cycles of life. It takes some very deep study, but the same principles are found in Christianity. Your friend has passed into a stage of the great circle of life, a time to rejoice! Let the guilty of heart come and let them be the ones who suffer. As for you, rejoice!
ReplyDeleteMark
Hi Maggie,
ReplyDeleteHey thanks for your concern about my ex sis in law. So far, she is just making her arrangements and saying goodbye to old friends! My daughter hasn't told me if she even got on the list or not, her health is very weak so she may not have even made the list. It is a mess for a 35 year old woman and mother of one 18 year old daughter. It is so sad over just losing a little weight!
Thanks again,
Mark
Thank you all for your wonderful comments. I really appreciate them. It was a very hard funeral, but I was able to celebrate life with my friends I had not seen in years. Depression and drug use tend to go hand in hand unfortunately. I just wish Becki had received the help she needed, and didn't feel her only way out was suicide. Rescue is possible, and this has pushed me to realize that no matter how one may appear it is not always how they feel, and they may be struggling with inner demons.
ReplyDelete